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A World Which Wasn't made for Them
It’s always ‘be true to yourself’, until a girl falls in love with another. Until she gazes at her from across the room, heart fluttering, head floating, fingers fidgeting underneath the desk, because a feeling she’s never felt before is overtaking her senses, leaving her breathless. Until she realises she’s never felt this way with the men society tells her she should love, yet when that girl walks by, her tongue twists and her legs feel like jelly and she’s never wanted anything more than to clasp her hands in her own. The smiles at 2am, the daydreams in class, the little hearts written on the edge of her textbook; nothing compared to the overwhelming swelling in her heart when she thought of her. But she knew she couldn’t. Because how could she be true to herself while the threat of disgust and isolation from those around her constricted her? How could she be with the only one who had made her feel loved, When others despised the thought of two girls hugging, and kissing, and dancing, and being happy and loving each other like anyone else would? How could she be true to herself, if she was living in a world which wasn’t meant for her? It’s always, “Love yourself”, until the words are printed over his locker. Until the messages are scratched onto his desk, His Instagram feed, His mind. ‘You’ll never be a real man’. Until he hated the body he was in, Hated the person he was. And yet when he finally found who he wanted to be, The man he wanted to be, Was forced to stand trapped behind the bars of what people who would only see him as. As a girl. How could he be happy, If he stared back at the reflection in the mirror, Not recognizing the person looking back? How could he be free, If he couldn’t walk through life without The words of strangers taunting him, Telling him he’s a sin. That he wasn’t made to be a man. That he’ll go to hell. How could he love himself, If he was living in a world that wasn’t meant for him? It’s always, “We’ll support you through anything,” until they don’t like just girls and boys. Until gender doesn’t matter to them, Until they’ll love anyone, regardless of how they identify. It’s always, “We’ll love you no matter what,” Until they feel restricted by the gender roles that has been brought upon them. Until they feel happier using pronouns that don’t adjust to that of a male or female. Until the androgyny of their looks suits them better than the way they felt before. It’s always “Treat everyone equally,” Until people who love the same sex as them are murdered. Until people who feel no romantic attraction to anyone are ostracised. Until gay is used as an insult. Until a man wears a dress. Because why would society let them live in a world That wasn’t meant for them? |
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